My Happy Bubble

I've wanted to write a post about dealing with a new endocrinologist for going on 2 weeks now. I even slithered out of my nice, cozy bed on this very rainy Saturday morning at the ungodly hour of 9 AM in order to do just that. After arming myself with some homemade chai tea and peanut butter toast (hey, a girl must be fortified for the complaining as I was getting ready to unleash), I..... got sidetracked.

For the next....five.... hours.

I was trying to (quickly) research some foodie spots for an upcoming trip to Ann Arbor my husband has promised me. A coworker had casually mentioned a deli/bakery that offered some pastry classes - it sounded of course, right up my alley.

That was the understatement of the century.

Zingerman's websites are in themselves pure magic for foodies. How in the world am I JUST NOW hearing about this place??? HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE? My day's plans of hitting the gym, cleaning, and hanging some pictures on my house's bare walls were washed away by words like "Culinary Adventure Society" and "Tuscany Food Tour".

I proceeded to read every word of each of their seven companies' websites. Basically, my trip to Ann Arbor is going to need to be extended - by several months. How else will I ever decide what cheese to buy in the creamery? Which sandwich to eat in the deli?? These are life and death situations, by god! After accepting the fact that my bank account will most likely be drained to the point we no longer have rent money, I even signed up for the mail-order catalogue. Brownie of the month club, here I come. We may be living in our Honda in an abandoned lot, but we'll have anchovy stuffed peppers and ventresca tuna. :)

All of these happy thoughts surrounded me in my own little bubble. I didn't want to think about the frustration of finding a new endocrinolgist and trying to get a referral from my PCP. I didn't want to remember the aggravation of driving an hour to said endocrinologist's office and then waiting an hour after my appointment time before being called back by a nurse. I definitely don't want to recall how I painstakingly logged months worth of blood sugars, food intake, basals and boluses and entered them into an excel spreadsheet which the endo never even glanced at. I really don't feel like brooding over the endo glancing at my Dexcom printouts and remarking, "Huh. Neat," while obviously having no idea whatsoever how to utilize them. I don't want to relive the nurse practitioner and the doctor huddling outside my door to discuss what my "diabetes plan" would be - without including ME, THE DIABETIC IN QUESTION, in said plan. Or arguing with the doctor over why I really did need to test my blood sugar 12-15 times a day. (Really, dude? You want to argue over someone taking good care of herself?) I don't want the exhaustion of restarting the whole process all over again.

I want to stay in my happy bubble with thoughts of Iberica ham and the imperfect hamburger.

Happiness in a shell

Today, something happened that made me absurdly, horrendously, ridiculously, crazily happy.

I bought some eggs.
These aren't just any eggs. First of all, they are a gorgeous light green color. Perfect for Spring!! And Easter - no dying necessary! And... Wednesday night with no dinner plans!

Secondly, these eggs were laid ...today. Hours ago, actually. Practically in my backyard.

The one (and only) great thing about small town living for me happens to be the little dilapidated farm house around the corner from my place. There's a little wooden sign in front of a gravel driveway announcing "Farm Fresh Eggs For Sale". For less than what a dozen eggs at the grocery costs, I got 2 dozen hot off the hen eggs, 12 brown and 12 special little green beauties. A few even still had a few downy feathers clinging to them.

Knowing where your food comes from is becoming more and more of an issue today, with huge agro-companies pushing through whatever legislation they want through the FDA, recalls of huge food product lines across the country, and the chemicals that are out there... (Sorry. That was was more political soap boxy than I was planning.) My point is, the shorter distance my food travels to me, the more I know about it - who's growing it, what their farming practices are, how processed it is. And it literally doesn't get any closer than this.

My neighbor, a lovely elderly woman who keeps a cow and 150 (!!) chickens, showed me around her little operation. Her farmhouse is something straight out of a movie - old, rambling, painted white, of course, with red barns out back and about 20 some cats chasing mice through the rafters. She took me out to the coop with her while she "let the hens out to get a little sun", since it was one of the first over 60's days of the spring. The majority of her flock are the large and beautiful orange and red feathered birds that lay the brown eggs - I didn't catch their breed name. The green eggs, however, came from three little Araucuna hens. These were much smaller, sandy colored, and had just the smallest tufts for a tail. As feathers floated slowly in the air, my neighbor recounted how she'd been selling eggs since she'd retired, and that she gets about a 5 gallon bucket's worth or eggs PER DAY!! (Now, that's a huge omelet!) She also gave me the sage advice that there was "nothing in this world better tasting than a still-warm egg from the chicken coop fried up right when you bring it inside." If you're a foodie like me, it literally doesn't get any better than this.

Now I'm off to find some egg recipes. :)

Meatless Monday... on Sunday

As I mentioned before, this horrible thing known as "a job" has been keeping me from cooking much lately. Which, apparently, has affected my psyche and led to this:

When it comes to clothes, I am not really a "has to have it" kind of girl. My compulsive shopping side takes over when I see cookbooks. Or in this case, cooking magazines. And, no, I will never admit to how much I spent on cooking magazines today. :) Maybe it soothes my soul to look at pictures of things I may cook in the future - a sort of "light at the end of the tunnel" when I have blessed FREE TIME back again.

At least today was Sunday. A day of leisure spent with my husband, who wondered aimlessly around a Kroger with me for an hour. (In return, I went to a movie with him. Movies are his cookbooks. :) ) Today was also the first time in three days we ate at home. And that, given the chain restaurant only black hole where I currently reside, is definitely a blessing.


This is one of my favorite recipes - quick, easy, filling, with a bit of a bite. Good hot or cold as leftovers, so it doubles as lunch for work tomorrow! And for those of you interested in cutting back on meat, it's perfect for a "Meatless Monday".. er, Sunday.

This recipe is originally from Martha Stewart's Everyday Food. I have to gripe just a little bit here - the editors of the magazine go to all the trouble of posting the nutritional information (which, don't get me wrong, I am incredibly grateful for), but they leave off how big a serving size is. Realistically, I can figure it out myself by the number of servings, but here is what usually happens in my house: Mr. Husband runs up the minute food is ready and takes an extra large helping. Then with what is left, I have to figure out how to divide the amount to make what would have been the 4 normal servings the recipe calls for. Really, Martha, can't you just go the extra mile and tell me that a serving is X number of cups?

(The pre-dinner bolus. Also, FYI -please excuse the pictures today. I am neither a food photographer or a real photographer, and I'm working off an iphone - I realize these are a bit blurry!)









Couscous Salad with Black Beans, Mushrooms, and Corn

(EF notes that if you can't find Israeli couscous, which is different than regular couscous, you can sub in Orzo. I used half and half because I ran out of couscous. :) )

-2 tablespoons extra virgin olive oil
-1 cup Israeli couscous
-coarse salt and ground pepper
- 1/2 pound cremini or button mushrooms, sliced 1/2 inch thick (I used baby bellas. I think they have more flavor.)
- 1 small bunch scallions, white and green parts separated and thinly sliced
- 1 1/4 cups corn kernels (the original recipe specifies fresh, but I used frozen. Still delicious.)
- 1 can (15.5 oz) black beans, drained and rinsed
- 2 tablespoons fresh lime juice
- 1 jalapeno, chopped (original recipe states this is optional. Don't leave it out. I think it would be a bit bland without it. This really gives it a nice flavor, in my opinion.)
- 1 avocado, sliced

1. In a medium saucepan, heat 1 tablespoon of oil over medium high. Add couscous and cook, stirring occasionally, until golden brown and fragrant, about 4 minutes. Add 1.5 cups of water, season with salt and bring to a boil. Reduce heat to low, cover, and simmer until liquid is absorbed and couscous is tender, about 15 minutes.

2. Meanwhile, in a large skillet, heat 2 teaspoons of olive oil over medium-high. Cook mushrooms, stirring occasionally, until golden-brown - about 5 minutes. Season with salt and pepper; transfer to a large bowl. Add 1 teaspoon of oil to skillet and add corn and scallion whites, stirring occasionally. Cook until soft and corn is browned, about 5 minutes. Season with salt and pepper and add to mushrooms.

3. Add couscous, black beans, lime juice, jalapeno, and scallion greens to mushroom mixture and toss to combine. Season to taste with salt and pepper. Divide among 4 bowls (preferably before your husband comes in the room) and top with avocado.

Nutritional info - Makes 4 servings. Per serving - calories -432; fat - 15; protein - 14; carb - 62; fiber - 11.

I know, I know. Three posts in a row and then I'm MIA for 2 weeks. Fast out of the blogging gates until burn out sets in.

Well, not exactly, anyway.

I have a new job. Which, quite unfairly, has been USURPING all of my time. (Even my cooking time, which really irks me.) I feel for all you folks who work 9-5 jobs. You have my complete respect. Getting up every single day and going to work is, well, exhausting. Before you think I'm a completely lazy piece of crap, let me explain.

For the past 9 years, I've worked a 12 hour shift. Which meant I only had to go IN three days a week. Blessed heaven. Four days a week to call my own. I'd honestly happily work a 16 hour shift in a day if it meant I only had to wake up early two days a week. Unfortunately, the "orientation process" is a five day-a-week, 8 hour day thing. And I think it might be killing me. :)

So all that blabber was really just a diversion from my real post. Being in a new work environment, I'm struggling with the "When to tell the coworkers about your diabetes" issue. I do feel like it's important that the people I work with know, but I'm not sure I'm ready to tell them. We are in that crucial feeling-each-other-out stage..... They are wondering, "Is she a hard worker? Is she lazy? Does she find excuses not to do things?" And yes, it is only my third day. Health care workers are notorious for eating their young, including the new folks in an institution. And again, yes, they DO make judgments that quickly. 5 minutes too long on lunch your first week, and you will forever be branded as a slacker. So if you bring out the diabetes card too early, it can have an effect on those judgments. "She uses her blood sugar as an excuse to get out of a room she doesn't like, or to go to lunch early...." Or worse - management starts doubting your ability and personal judgment in your job because of your diabetes. (That has never happened to me, thankfully. I hope it never does... but I don't want to take chances, either.) I like to establish myself as a good worker, a team player, a knowledgeable and trustworthy employee before dealing with any of the assumptions and misinformation surrounding diabetes. And when I do let the cat out of the bag, it is usually only to one person at a time, on a need to know basis - usually that does the trick. (Gossip about ANYTHING in a hospital travels fast.) And I try to be sneaky about it. I'll actually wear my medical ID - which I'm not great about doing at other times. I'll pull out my pump during lunch to program in a bolus. Things that aren't in your face but people sometimes notice. On the other hand, the worst possible way to introduce people to your diabetes - testing in front of them. Then I get a bevy of "You're doing that here?" looks, intrusive questions about what the number on the screen is or means, and stories of, "My grandmother had that and lost her leg...." But that is just my own experience. Should I care what they say? No, of course not. My health is more important than those misconceptions. Does it bother me? Uh, yeah. (Try listening to someone tell you about gruesome things that could happen to you, and then try to feel nice and neighborly toward them.) Maybe I am just being too sensitive about the whole thing. Or just way too type-A, trying to direct the introduction of a large part of my life. I don't actually mind having the conversation with people or teaching them about what life with this disease is really about - I just need to do it on my turf.

What do you think? Is it worse NOT to tell people right away? Am I just being touchy? How do you introduce things you are sensitive about to new people?

A Small Win

In the world of ups and downs that is diabetes on a daily basis, I think it's important to celebrate every accomplishment, no matter how tiny...


Today I managed a 6 hour flatline on the Dexcom. I know there's been a lot of talk about no-hitters out there lately, and frankly, I've never even come close. (But a HUGE KUDOS to those who have done it! You are my heroes.) But in my little stratosphere of bi-weekly changing basal rates, yes, a mere 6 hours is something to celebrate!

Cheers to that!

10 Spices You Can't Live Without

I was perusing one of my new favorite foodie websites today - www.seriouseats.com - when I came across this interesting article: The 10 Spices That Should Be In Your Pantry Right Now. An interesting thought, right? Especially for those of us who depend on the power of these spices to make healthy food, in order to nix the fat, sugar, or salt content.

And given that my spice drawer looks like this, needless to say I'd have a hard time picking only 10. (I love the writer describing this as "trying to decide which child to abandon". I feel the same way.)

Reading this article helped me see just how different people's culinary personalities are. The writer listed several spices I'd never even heard of - a feat, considering the size of the spice drawer. I mean, I'll go out of my way to try something new any day of the week. (Grains of Paradise are used for something other than beer? Who knew?) But to say those exotic, unknown powders are your all-time favorite top ten??

Maybe this list says a little about MY culinary personality.... A little basic, maybe a little boring.. But enough spice and pizzazz to make something tasty, homey, and comforting. :)

It's a good thing the article differentiates between "spices" and "herbs". Because that gives me a teensy bit of wiggle room and a whole other list. :)

My Top 10 Herbs:

This list was easier, and therefore a little more basic. I think it points to my European cooking background. :)

1. Parsley (what do I cook that this doesn't go on?)
2. Thyme
3. Basil
4. Cilantro
5. Sage
6. Oregano
7. Rosemary
8. Dill
9. Bay Leaves
10. Mint

My Top 10 Spices:

Way, way, way harder.

1. Crushed red pepper.
LOVE it. how it can heat up anything just enough. Whenever what I'm eating is just missing *something*, I throw a little of this on there.

2. Cumin.
I go through this like water.

3. Fleur de Sel.
Generally I think salt is so basic, that like it's counterpart whole black peppercorn, it doesn't belong here. But the crunch of fleur de sel on pasta, on potatoes, on.. pretty much anything - that's something special.

4. Curry powder.
Yeah, yeah, I know there's really no such thing in real Indian cooking as "curry powder" and it was created by/ mass produced for the British, blah, blah, blah. I don't care. It makes things YUM.

5. Whole Cardamom.
Cardamom is one of those really cool things you can do almost anything with, sweet or savory. Throw a pod in a curry dish. Bake pear bread. No Norwegian baked good is complete without it. (Apparently the India and Scandinavia are the world's largest consumers of cardamom. Random tidbit.) I happen to especially love cardamom because a really cool friend of mine taught me how to make homemade chai tea using cardamom pods. Before her divine intervention, I had no idea that you had to peel the cardamom pod to get to the piece you actually grind and use. (Sorry to the coworkers who ate that pear cardamom cake and probably found it a little chewy in spots....)

6. Vanilla bean.
The real stuff, not the extract. Pure goodness. Perfect just in vanilla sugar. Or vanilla Splenda, depending on your personal pancreatic workings.

7. Vietnamese cinnamon.
I know what you're thinking. Now I'm really getting snobby. First with the salt, now with cinnamon? Believe me, I would have thought cinnamon was all the same too - until that same nice friend dragged me into a Penzey's and forced me to try the Vietnamese cinnamon. I promise you there is a big difference.

8. Chili powder.
Ahh, back to earth. I don't care which kind of chili powder I have. Basic, smoky, whatever. As long as it makes a pot of meat, beans, and veggies delectable, I'm in.

9. Ginger.
Another one of those multidimensional spices. I use it fresh and powdered. Cakes, my favorite Christmas time ginger cookies, Thai dishes, Indian dishes, drinks, even pickled or candied. Nothing is quite so refreshing.

10. Asafoetida.
This one is a relatively new one to my list. Also known as hing, it's another addition to my list from my wise friend. (She has apparently had a great impact on my spice leanings..) I use this spice in Indian food, and it's really hard to describe. I always think of it as the kind of extra punch in food you wouldn't realize was there until it was missing. I think it's a really deep and savory flavor, kind of like garlic and onion powder.


So, on that note, happy eating, kids!

Meyer Lemon Sage Olive Oil Cake

Confession #1 - I am not a baker.

And that is not due to the crazy blood sugar thing. I love to eat sweet stuff - I have a theory that a rogue pancreas makes you crave sugar more. But making it? Lets just say when the annual cookie swap comes around every year, my pals prepare themselves for some epic whining from my corner. "Cookies??!!!! I have to make four dozen COOKIES??!!!! Can't I just provide the app and come to taste test?"

The thing is, I am completely, utterly, totally without any kind of patience whatsoever. (Another genetic defect, I'm afraid. Add it to the pile.) I usually start the cooking process after I'm already starving, and I'll pull things straight out of the pan and into my mouth, burning the crap out of my tongue. (It's all worth it in the end.) Baking takes a large chunk of time. And attention to details. And things like exactness in measuring, and following directions.

So again, back to the irony. The first recipe on my diabetic blog is for CAKE!!! ::giggle, giggle:: But since we're talking about me here, it's actually a really simple cake. The hardest part is cutting out a circle of parchment paper. (Another reason I avoid baking - so many extra steps.)




I've wanted to find something to do with meyer lemons for a very long time. I was looking for some kind of coffee cake like option, but this is better. It's not super sweet, except for the glaze, and the sage adds some interest.

(making sure I can eat the finished product.)

Oh, and unlike me, pay attention to the part that orders you to spoon the lemon syrup over the cake slowly and meditatively. Because apparently if you get impatient and just spoon it all on at once, the syrup runs down the sides of your cabinets and only a fraction actually ends up in your cake.

The recipe is originally from blue-kitchen.com. It makes eight pieces that are 60 grams of carb apiece or ten that are 48 grams of carb, according to my calculations (no guarantees there!)

Meyer Lemon Sage Olive Oil Cake

1-1/2 cups all-purpose unbleached flour
2 teaspoons baking powder
1/8 teaspoon salt
5 teaspoons Meyer lemon zest, divided
1/2 cup plain kefir or buttermilk (Note - I never keep buttermilk in my house. I just put a tablespoon of white vinegar in a cup of milk and go from there.)
1 scant cup white sugar
3 large eggs
1/2 cup olive oil (not extra virgin) (Note #2 - I'm not sure why this recipe insists on NOT extra-virgin olive oil. It's all I keep in my house, so that's what I used and it tasted good to me.)
2 teaspoons fresh sage, finely minced

For syrup:
1/4 cup powdered sugar
1/4 cup Meyer lemon juice

For icing:
3/4 cup powdered sugar
2-1/2 teaspoons Meyer lemon juice (Note #3 - My icing needed way, way more lemon juice than this to come together - like 5 teaspoons. I thought it odd the originally recipe said this would be runny, because with the original 2 1/2 teaspoons it was one big lump.)

Preheat oven to 350ºF. Oil a 9-inch springform pan using the same olive oil you use in the cake. Cut a round of parchment paper for the bottom of the pan, place it in the pan, then oil that too. Sprinkle a little flour on the bottom of the pan. Bang the side of the pan with the heel of your hand to evenly distribute the loose flour.

Put into a medium bowl the flour, baking powder, salt and 4 teaspoon of the zest. Mix well with a fork.

In a large bowl, mix the buttermilk or kefir, eggs, sugar, olive oil and sage. Whisk thoroughly.

Add the dry ingredients into the wet and whisk everything together. Pour into the springform pan. Place in the center of the hot oven.

Baking usually takes about 28 to 30 minutes, but set a timer for 24 minutes to be on the safe side. The cake is ready when a tester inserted into the center comes out clean. Take the cake out of the oven and put it on a rack to cool. After 10 minutes, take off the sides of the pan.

In another ten minutes, poke the cake all over with a heavy fork. Then mix together the syrup ingredients. If the sugar won’t entirely dissolve, heat it gently in a saucepan over low heat while stirring, just for 30 seconds or so. Carefully spoon the syrup on top of the cake, a little at a time. The idea is that the syrup will ooze into the cake through all those holes. Slowly pouring a spoonful of syrup onto the cake and then spreading it around with the back of the spoon helps and also is very meditative.

After you’ve spread all the syrup on the cake, go away for about 45 minutes. Then come back and mix together the icing ingredients. Coat the top of the cake with the icing—it will be a bit runny. While the icing is still wet, sprinkle the remaining teaspoon of zest on top.